Wot I Dun On My Weekend

Cor well it wer great lotsa peeple came to my party on Saterdy cos I WAS TEN!

They came and they drank stuff mostly it came out of boxes an’ bottles and they scoffed orl sorts of fings ‘specially cake and mor cake. And they stood in a circle and remembered The Old Days I fink it was called Nostaljer, like when I was born and wen I was much younger. They larfed it was good. And someone went to sleep and they said he was a Vegetable and made him hold a carrot but he didn’t eat it! I fink it was supposed to be a willy and it was supposed to be Funny and Mummy says mine might grow big like that one day.

And then they all got up in the morning and came on my Tenf Berfdy R*n and it was a really nice day and they came to Reay and went for a r*n. My frend Dickhead was there too, he hasn’t got a big willy yet. There was woods and fields and some of them were reely reely wet har-har that was fun and there were hills and rivers and October sunshine and coloured leaves and then there was a beeyer stop. And then after the beeyer stop there was mor of the same and then it finished. Evrywun sed it was a really good r*n so that was Good.

And evenchooly all the slow ones caught up just like my Mum says I will evenchooly at school and they did the circle thing where they say lots of fings and sing the same song over and over and some stand in the middle and drink. And the one called Baldbrick had done 200 r*ns an’ got a nice T shirt and others got downdown fings and then they all got in their brrm brrms and went to the pub.

So I am really happy that I AM TEN! I like berfdays can I have anuver next week?

Fank you orl for being my frends.