R*n 404: Baines Cragg

Morticia was feeling considerate for her last r*n as GM and held the circle outside her house, so we didn’t have to stand in the cold wind on the windswept fells!

We crowded into cars and set off for the start of the r*n only to pass two latecomers cycling up the hill to Morticia’s house – assumed they would join us at some point.

On on onning, the first group of two set off down the hill to go to the on house via the road, followed by the second group of two who followed at a distance.

As the rest of us splashed through puddles, shiggy and becks other groups formed. There was a group of five rambos who were later joined by the group of three latecomers forming a group of eight.

The group of eight wimps eventually split in to a group of three, another group of three and a group of two.

All the groups got wet and muddy feet and legs with Upperskirt covering her legs and hands after a hash crash with a soft landing.

Hattie joined Speedbump and Dormouse in the latecomers group cos she ran out of fuel on the way over – to make up for being late they all were Short Cutting B**t**ds and cut up the hillside to catch up with the proper rambos.

Turkish Delight and The Gobbler strolled along behind the two groups of three wimps and were later overtaken by the rambos and got to the on house in time to eat – good timing!

Twisted, Major Twit and Laurence regaled the rest of the group of eight with renditions of girl power songs – poor No More Cum just the one boy with a harem of seven girls!

Minor Twat and Bitter were the first to the on house with Cyberseptic and Eee-coli a close second.  The very last bit of the r*n didn’t get r*n as the Front R*nning B**t**ds didn’t follow it, so nobody else did either.

Septic Canary and Forever Blowing joined us at the on house – they had been otherwise engaged for the morning in their individual groups of one.

Once back and cleaned up (a bit) we had a presentation by the GM – she showered many of the hash with her ‘mingots’.  These included Speed Bump and Dormouse for being ‘the assuming ones’, Cyberseptic for being ‘most serious’, Forever Blowing and Bubbles the ‘hosts and hostess with the mostess’, Lurch for being ‘the blind one’, Upper Skirt and Cum Yak Yak ‘the lost ones’, Off His Trolley for being ‘the deaf one’, Antiseptic for being one of the ‘last minute hares’, Bitter for being the ‘flashiest’, Sir Tom Tom for ????, Baldbrick for something else I can’t remember and White Noise for having the ‘last word. Dormouse was presented with his 100 r*ns tankard.

White Noise served her fantastic food – thanks loads – and Off His Trolley made sure the drinks flowed.

The AGPU took an unprecedented 10 minutes!

Cum Yak Yak went to sleep on the radiator.

So, all in all a riveting AGPU!