There was a good turnout at the Black Bull when I turned up for my 200^th r*n, including some old friends (Simple), some recent newbies to LVH3 (Tidal Dave and Grand Mattress) and a newby to hashing full stop (Dorit). Besides Atomic Caton, her (very tall) hubby Agent Orange was also back in the fold along with their two doggies who looked ready for action. Bitter and our non-hashing friend Bob were also there to see us r*nners off and they then went off to do something more exciting which involved trains. Upperskirt did ask where they had concealed their anoraks, only to be given a rude response). STT promised a reasonably short r*n with no complicated sections to navigate and we set off with the sun shining.

There was a split right from the start with Wimps going downhill and Rambos uphill towards Caton Green. Due to most of LVH3 members living in the vicinity, us Rambo’s had anticipated where we were going and were therefore not surprised at turning right off the main road heading further upwards across the fields. A very narrow “stone stile” between two rocks on the way up caused us to lose a few seconds and one doggie got picked up and thrown over due to its athletic sized body. Had one or two of the Wimps joined us, we suspect we would have had to throw them over too (naming no names ....Baldbrick)!

A few checks later and a run down to the forge hamlet brought us back into the main village where we caught up with the Wimps. Coming up from the rear, we surprised the dawdling hounds and were accused of waking them up from their sleepy amble! WhiteNoise was heard gassing to Grand Mattress so we knew at least two of them were awake! On across the main road to a welcome Beer Stop at STTs crib which was also crib to Morticia’s budgie (don’t ask)!?

The second half saw us caught up with a half marathon event and several of the marshalls tried to direct us onto the running course (we actually must have looked like proper runners, how bad is that)! Onto the river path and a very long fish-hook which was adhered to religiously by all, even if most of the pack decided to stop and wait at the river bridge. A hardy few did go back to gather up the knitting circle including Twit who made me go back and as she is now going under the title “Major”, having dropped the Twit off (not you Twot), I wasn’t going to decline the offer to r*n some more (sir, yes sir)! Another R & W split took place after the bridge, which eventually brought us all together on the cycle track and we made it back to the On Inn past Off His Trolley/WhiteNoise crib.

The circle saw STT presenting me with my lovely purple shirt for achieving 200 r*ns and I gave my best Acceptance/Thank you speech, which didn’t include thanks to my hubby, my mother, my teacher, cat or any tears, although I was very overwhelmed! Who would have thought I could have kept going for all those r*ns with the LVH3 motley crew.... but I LOVE YOU ALL!!

Down Downs went to Dorit for breaching Health and Safety on the river bridge and Baldbrick apologising to Desmond Dekker, gave a fine rendition of the hit “The Israelites” as her down down song (as that is where Dorit originates from). The other down down went to Grand Mattress for turning up and finding it “not too hard”, “not too long” and she agreed she will “come again”!

Thanks to STT for a great r*n and also a big thanks to LVH3 for having me all this time and On On for the next 200!

Twisted.

xx