R*n 776: High Bentham

A great start to 2022, with Sir Tom Tom and Wears the Soap, haring r*n 776. They arrived at the start wearing very stylish matching snow boots, and although no snow they showed signs of having been knee high in mud, but denied all knowledge of any shiggy. Wears the Soap gave a detailed description of the course, explaining that the Rambos should be very careful when joining the road after the muddy field, be sure to turn right and not left to avoid returning on the Wimps course. Did anyone take in where that was?? Meanwhile Sir Tom Tom was very quick to blame the previous several days/weeks of continuous rain for the ground being too wet to leave a trail of flour and suggested that if there were no obvious markings, the hounds should just follow the Bentham Heritage Trail.

We set off on a road, a nice solid tarmac covered road, but not for long, as soon we hit the first mire covered path where there was much slipping and sliding, then on through field after field of squelching, oozing sludge. Finally we arrived at a road, one of those nice solid tarmac covered things that I mentioned before, we'd not seen anything like that for several miles. At this point the Rambos were confidently led by Thunder Dick, "on on" he shouted, I know where we are. Well he may have done, but luckily Forever Blowing spotted that it was time to hit the shiggy again and expertly led the hounds off the road, over styles and through several more fields of slime. At this point she also sneakily asked if I'd been scribe before, just when I was trying valiantly to stay upright. I said I hadn't, and that was it, I was scribe, no training, no handbook, nothing! I hope I'm doing ok???

But no time to worry as we had another bog to traverse, was there no end to this mud, however there in front us was the most professionally printed paper sign directing the Rambos right, while the Wimps went straight on (did I hear later that Bedside Manner missed seeing it? How?). At last another road, could this be the turning that Wears the Soap mentioned in his preamble?

Down, down, down past the "Heiland Coos" looking cute and shaggy with their long horns and we'd arrived at the Beer Stop, with an excellent selection of snacks, the peanut biscuits being particularly popular.

But that meant up, up, up after our break and if you thought there had been plentiful mud in the first half, we had mud with bells on in the second as we ran though one quagmire after another. But there were good markings at this point with a whole tree covered in flour. I should perhaps mention that I was wearing the most unsuitable footwear, an old pair of road shoes, with no grip at all, so I am amazed that I made it back without ending up in the mud, and dry, as there was no rain and even the odd glimpse of sunshine and blue skies.

But make it back we did, but where were the RAs, I thought we had three, but not one was present to oversee the proceedings, however we managed admirably without. Down downs going to the hares for setting such an excellently muddy course, Thunder Dick for trying and failing to take us the wrong way, Plucker for briefly leading the pack, Twisted for taking selfies in the circle, Bitter for wearing his wellies and not selling them ( £1000 was mentioned….!) and Off His Trolley for watering the trees not once but twice! Circle over, I dashed off to the Co op to buy milk, but I'm sure everyone had an excellent meal in the Black Bull, High Bentham.

Happy New Year

Glassy Lady